


Staring

by wematch



Category: Carry On - Rainbow Rowell
Genre: Established Relationship, Fluff, Hand Jobs, M/M, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-05
Updated: 2017-08-05
Packaged: 2018-12-11 06:28:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,434
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11708748
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wematch/pseuds/wematch
Summary: It’s been months since they started dating and Simon is finally ready to go a bit further.





	Staring

For the past few months Baz and I have been getting to know each other better. We still fight over silly things, but with a kiss all is forgotten. It drives Penny mad.

I know now that Baz has been waiting for me; for us to happen for a long time. He never thought this could actually happen; that he would get his happy ending. And I never thought this could be mine either, but I’m so glad we have each other now.

Back then, I was so clueless about my own feelings. Baz teases me sometimes about it. How I followed him everywhere with the pretense of wanting to know what he was doing, what he was _plotting_ against me.

It all sounds ridiculous now, but I didn’t know it then; why I was so obsessed with him. And now, as I look at Baz, lying by my side on the bed, I think how lucky I am to have him.

“You’re staring,” he whispers.

He’s so close that I feel his breath on my face. Staring is his thing, but I love doing it too. I like that now I can just look at him and take my time to memorize every detail of him. Like how he looks so peaceful right now, with his eyes closed and hair falling carelessly around his face.

I gently tuck a loose strand of hair behind his ear. “I am,” I say, smiling.

He opens one eye, and I notice the corner of his mouth quirk up, showing me that he’s trying not to smile. So I move closer and put an arm around him and he takes that as a sign that I don’t want to sleep just yet. So he moves his head closer, and our lips brush.

“What are you thinking about, love?” he asks, and I can feel his lips moving against my own.

“About you…”I lightly kiss him. “About us.”

And then he kisses me. It’s starts soft, lips slowly moving together, his hand slowly coming to my neck. Then I put my hand on his hair and grab it to bring him closer to me and something sparks in Baz, I love how my touch can have such a reaction. He puts his leg between mine and pushes me into the mattress, never stopping his kisses. I let him, and when he’s settled half on top of me, he deepens the kiss and I hum in approval. It’s so good; it’s been so good everytime he kisses me.

I let my hands run over his body, from his back to his waist so that I’m holding him close to me. Baz is full of intention now, his own hands all over me as he starts grinding against me.

I start to move too. We’ve done this game countless times, putting each other to the limit to see who needs to ask the other to stop first. I know he wants this and he’s waiting for me. But I want it too; I just don’t know if I’m ready for the full thing yet, and I’ve been trying to find a way to just tell him that I want to try to go a bit further at a time, but I don’t know how. Usually when we’re almost at the point of no going back, shirts lost in the process and both a panting mess, he moves away.

I feel him hard on top of me and he moans in my mouth while I pull him impossibly closer to me. It’s all about the friction now; or how to get more of it.

I tug on his shorts to let him know that I want them gone and he gladly complies. When he’s back I open my legs so that he can put himself between them.

He stays still for a few seconds looking at me, staring because I only have my boxers on (I can’t sleep in clothes, especially now that’s almost summer) and I’m visibly hard. He’s on his knees in between my legs, and I can’t stand the distance. I reach forward with my arms and pull his t-shirt up. Then I grab him by the neck and bring him on top of me again.

We both moan at the contact. He puts his forehead against mine and moves on top of me. It feels bloody amazing and as I shove my mouth on his again and arch my back up to be able to fill him as close to me as I can, Baz moves back, and I groan at the loss of contact.

He stays there, just centimeters away from my body. And I feel ridiculous; neither of us wants to stop, so why am I letting him move away? I move up to catch his mouth again, running my hands up from wrist to his neck so that I can turn his mouth to mine.

“Simon…” he says weakly, between our kisses. “We should stop for a bit.”

I push him slightly away so that I can speak and he moves to my neck. “No, Baz…”

“No?” he asks, while kissing my neck.

“I just don’t want to stop…uhm… just yet.”

“Let me know when you do,” he whispers in my ear, and it send shivers all over my body.

His mouth goes back to mine and he keeps grinding on top of me, I feel myself getting closer and closer to the edge. He’s panting and our kisses are getting sloppier. Fuck, I want this.

I start to move his boxers down and he doesn’t stop me; instead, he moves his body so that’s easier for me to move them down. I’ve never seen him naked before; the sight of him like this is doing crazy things to me.

I’ve thought countless times before about how this could go, but nothing can truly prepare you for seeing someone like this. No matter how many times you think about something the real thing is never the same. There’s really no way of preparing for it. Baz, naked on top of me, flustered and panting. It’s definitely my new favorite way of seeing him.

He’s not moving, probably wondering if this the moment that I want to stop. I don’t, so I take my boxers off too and I swear I hear him gasp when I do it.

He’s suddenly all over me again, kissing me senseless and I’m moaning from the contact of his dick against mine. Fuck, precome is leaking from both of us when he puts his hand around me and I give a satisfied groan. He starts stroking me and my eyes jerk open to see it.

I stare at him and he gives me a devilishly look. “Feels good?”

“Yeah–” I groan,  and that’s when he stops touching me and starts smirking. I want to take that expression off his face, so I put my hand around him and his eyes flutter close as a soft moan escapes from his mouth.

I stroke him until he’s a mess of limbs moving uncontrollably against me. Then I kiss him hard. I know he’s close and I want to see it happening.

Baz moves then, puts his hand around us both and we start to move together. I put my hand around us too. It doesn’t take us long to come after that.

***

We lay in bed, side to side trying to calm down so I turn my head towards him, only to find him already looking at me with a fond expression on his face.

“Now, look who’s staring…” I say slowly as I move closer to him.

“Am I not allowed to stare?”

“Or course you are,” I mumble as I rest my face in the space between his neck and shoulder. I like falling asleep like this; I feel safe with his scent all around me.

He puts his arm around me and starts rubbing my back lazily; I immediately feel my eyelids getting heavier.

“Baz?” I whisper, there’s something I keep wanting to say to him but I haven’t had the courage, but now after this I feel like it’s the right moment to just get it out.

“Hm?”

“I love you.” There, I said it.  And it doesn’t sound strange when I say it, it just feels like it’s the truth.

“I love you too, love,” he tells me in a whisper whilst turning his head to my side to kiss my hair gently.

And with that, I let myself fall asleep in his arms.

 


End file.
